Dating Advice > First Date Tips Guide
by Coaching Staff • Updated: July 18, 2023
The 2023 “First Date” Guide
First Date Basics
First Date Ideas
First Date Conversation
- How to Be More Interesting on the Date
- 19 Best Questions to Ask Her
- 18 Things to Say on a Date
- Complete Guide to Flirting with a Girl
- Complete Guide to Charismatic Conversations
Reading Her “Attraction Level”
Additional Guide
The Chemistry Secret for First Dates
Additional First Date Tips
Besides sex, first dates are the most fun part of the game. You have two people who barely know each other alone and isolated with sexual tension and possibility in the air. Here’s a few first date tips to make them more successful.
First Date Tip #1. Pick the right day.
Don’t try to do a first date on a weekend, especially if you haven’t kissed her yet. Weekend dates send the wrong message that you value her too much, ready to give a “primetime” night to someone you just met. Plus chances are she will be more busy on weekends anyway. Stick to Monday through Thursday for the first date.
First Date Tip #2. Pick the right venue.
You can get a lot done taking girls to coffee and ice cream dates, but if your goal is to get into her pants as fast as possible, you must go for drinks. Start the date at a quiet bar well after dinner so you don’t have to worry about getting food. Even if the date is short of a blockbuster, it’s very hard not to get at least a make out if she’s had three drinks in her. If you want to be creative, then here are 13 great date ideas.
First Date Tip #3. Preparation.
There is no way you can memorize enough routines for a two hour or more date, and even if you can it would be a stupid waste of energy. You’re going to have to be, well, real, and this is where I hope your vibe is fun and interesting. If not then dates will be a challenge. The only thing I do before dates is have two fun routines ready, usually the cube and some type of fake palm read. I also remind myself of a handful of innocent touching moves that prime her for the kiss.
Quick tip: On your way to dates call up a couple friends and shoot the shit for a while. Since first dates are mostly a? talking affair, you want that part of your brain ready. The worst thing you can do is lounge around at home all day in front of your computer and then go out without talking beforehand.
Sparking “the Vibe” on a Date
First Date Tip #4. She’s more nervous than you are.
It’s natural to be nervous, especially with the pressure of getting laid hanging over your head. But I guarantee you she is more nervous than you are, simply because she’s a girl and we all know the ones who can’t even go to the bathroom without a friend. The more you have your internal game straightened out and believe a girl should prove her value to you, the less you will be nervous. Think of her on a stage, twirling and spinning for your pleasure. Whether this is reality or not doesn’t matter… just believe it.
First Date Tip #5. Show up late.
I have a friend who shows up fifteen minutes late and I’m not sure that is extreme or not but I’m always at least five minutes later. You want to stir up some anxiety and fear that she’s being stood up so that her insecurities are driven inward instead of on you, where she judges you and picks for flaws. Even if you arrive early, mill around for a while until you are late. I cannot stress how important this is.
First Date Tip #6. Focus on escalation.
That’s your number one goal. A touch here or there that gets extended as the night goes on, then touching her hands and putting your arm behind her in the booth of the lounge you picked. The first half hour will have almost no touching probably, but then the drinks get in your system and it becomes natural. While you don’t want to sound like a total idiot on the date, the reason you kiss her will be more because of the touching than the conversation. The kiss will be a foregone conclusion.
Escalation Made Simple
- See Also: Female Arousal & Escalation Guide
First Date Tip #7. Go for the lay.
Even if you don’t think you will get the lay on the same night, it’s still a smart idea to go for it as you drop her home because it makes your job much easier for the second date. The farther you get on the first date, the less work you have to do on a second. Plus even if the date goes well, you can’t make the assumption there will be a second. How about if her long lost ex boyfriend calls the next day? You’ll kick yourself if you didn’t push as far as you could get.
As you probably noticed, most of the work in turning out a good first date is done before you even show up. A little bit of preparation goes a long way in dates, and it makes sense to do because you worked hard to meet her and get her out and don’t want to blow it with stupid mistakes.
I made A LOT of stupid mistakes when first starting out in the game, but even before that I remember my strategy to getting kisses used to be hoping and wishing she’d make the move and do it on her own. I was too scared I would get rejected and look like an idiot. I sucked it up when I had enough and just started approaching like a machine, going on dates every week and noting what worked and what didn’t.
Hope you put these first date tips into use.
See Also