Dating> Attraction > Think About You
by Bobby Rio • Updated: August 7, 2022
- The #1 Way to Get a Girl “Hooked” on You
- The “Hot” and “Cold” Trick to Make Her Chase
- Say THIS to Make Her Fall in Love
How do you take a girl from kind of liking you… to being completely obsessed with you?
That’s what we’re going to talk about in today’s article.
- 1 So how do you move her to that place where she’s chasing you?
- 2 5 Ways to Keep a Woman Thinking About You
- 3 #1: Do NOT Be a Sure Thing
- 4 #2: Be Less Predictable
- 5 #3: Become a 3-Dimensional Character
- 6 #4: Eliminate “Nice Guy” Behavior
- 7 5 Ways to Stop Being the “Nice Guy”
- 8 #5: Create Mystery
- 9 Next Steps to Make Her Think About Constantly
A lot of guys meet a girl and things start out okay…
They get along, they don’t argue, there’s a physical attraction, she’s into him.
But they get stuck on that plateau. The woman never reaches that next level where she’s chasing him.
You can tell when a girl’s really into you versus when she’s settling for you.
So how do you move her to that place where she’s chasing you?
You have to make her think about you nonstop.
When Rob Judge and I teach our attraction method UNLOCK THE SCRAMBLER, one of the core components is that a woman must think about you when you’re not around.
The more time she spends thinking about you, the more she slowly falls in love with you.
Most guys fail to realize that a lot of the things that you’re doing actually cause her to think less about you.
Mistakes that scare women away:
- Do NOT Do This When a Girl “Pulls Away”
- 5 Ways to Stop Being the “Nice Guy”
- 4 Reasons Women Get Bored
5 Ways to Keep a Woman Thinking About You
What you’ll find as you go through these is that guys who do well with women tend to do these things naturally.
However, when you develop feeling for a woman too soon, you tend to forget this advice. This is why it’s important to review.
Another thing that helps instill a lot of this into your mind is to develop an “abundance mentality” when it comes to women.
#1: Do NOT Be a Sure Thing
When you’re hanging out with a woman and you both sense it’s going well and then she goes home, what happens?
If she’s completely sure that everything went well, if she’s completely sure you’re into her 100 percent… then there’s really nothing for her to anticipate. Nothing for her to worry about.
She’ll get bored and take you for granted.
So you never want to present yourself as a guy who’s already totally hooked.
I’ll give you an example of something I did that worked, and I didn’t even do it purposefully.
Example of NOT Being a “Sure Thing”
When I was first dating my girlfriend, at the end of each date, I would say, “Talk to you soon,” or “See you soon.”
Most guys at the end of the date would be already trying to plan the next date.
They would say, “When can I see you again?” or “Want to have dinner on Saturday?”
I would just say, “See you soon.”
This would cause my girlfriend to go home and think, “What did he mean by that? When is ‘soon’? Does that mean he didn’t have fun? Does that mean I’m not going to see him again?”
When she doesn’t know exactly what something means, it makes her think about you nonstop. Because you’re no longer a sure thing.
Nice guys unfortunately come across as a sure thing.
They have a good first date, maybe a good second date, and they rush to say, “Hey, I have a cousin’s wedding in three months, I’d like you to go with me.”
Now she’s going, “He’s already thinking three months in the future.”
She knows she’s got you completely hooked. It was too easy. She gets bored. She assumes you must not be that great.
Don’t be a sure thing.
#2: Be Less Predictable
This is something that Rob Judge and I really drill in UNLOCK THE SCRAMBLER.
There’s a lot of ways to be less predictable. Most guys think of the obvious ones.
The average guy is going to go, “Oh, let me take longer to respond to her texts.”
That’s one element, yes. But there are many more.
An Example of Predictable vs Unpredictable
I was working with a client recently and he said that every night he would have a “Good night” text conversation with the girl he was dating. It would go something along the lines of: “Good night.” “Good night.” “Hope your day went well.” “Hope yours did, too.”
That becomes predictable. Predictable gives her nothing to think about.
So I said, “Well, the simplest thing you can do in that situation is occasionally not send that good night text. Then she’ll wonder why that goodnight text didn’t come.”
So you want to constantly be thinking: what are the expectations that she has and how can I occasionally break those expectations?
Break expectations occasionally, not all the time.
When you break an expectation, you open up a moment of uncertainty. That’s when a woman is thinking about you nonstop.
If she gets that “good night” text from you, she can go to bed and her mind can drift off to other topics. But if that text doesn’t come, she’ll say, “Where is he tonight? Who’s he with?”
Next thing you know, she’s on Facebook checking to see if you checked in anywhere. She is slowly convincing herself, “I must really like this guy if I’m giving him this much attention.”
More on Keeping Her Guessing:
- The Psychology of Ignoring a Woman
- The Scrambler Technique (explained)
- The Attractive Art of “Hot” and “Cold”
#3: Become a 3-Dimensional Character
In Unlock the Scrambler the entire first section, Phase One, is about this idea of three-dimensionalizing yourself.
When a woman meets you, she kind of gathers who she thinks you are. Maybe you’re a software engineer and you have a group of friends.
She puts all these pieces together. Then she pigeonholes you.
She decides, “He’s the nice software engineer. He hangs out with these people.” She has this vision of who you are as a person. When that vision is confirmed over and over again, she takes it for granted. It’s no longer exciting.
So we tell our students: figure out how to introduce new information that turns you from being a one-dimensional cutout into a multi-dimensional guy.
An Example of Being 3-Dimensional
I was working with a client recently and he’s very spiritual. So spirituality dominates a lot of his conversations.
I said, “Well that’s great! But a woman’s going to pigeonhole you that way as ‘the spiritual guy.’
She’ll think she has you completely figured out.
So you want to occasionally add a contradiction into it.
What is a contradiction?
Maybe you also tend to be ruthless with business? If you introduce evidence of a cutthroat business sense, you’re no longer this one-dimensional person.
If you think about movies, the most compelling characters are ones with multiple dimensions like the anti-hero.
In Star Wars, most people’s favorite character is Han Solo.
Han was a three-dimensional character. He was a good guy, with “bad guy” traits mixed in. This makes him a more interesting character.
And that’s what you want to make a woman think when she sees you as three-dimensional: “What’s going to happen next?”
That’s why Phase One of The Scrambler System focuses on asking yourself: “How can somebody pigeonhole me and how can I break that image?”
#4: Eliminate “Nice Guy” Behavior
Nice guys are very predictable. They’re very agreeable and they’re not into confrontation.
What’s interesting is that women feed on drama.
They enjoy it. It gives them an emotional high.
The more of a nice guy you are, the less drama that you’re giving her.
If a woman doesn’t have any drama surrounding you, she doesn’t think about you.
She needs that drama to keep her mind on you.
Examples of Adding “Drama”
Some guys naturally create drama because they follow their own agenda.
Or sometimes because they don’t have their shit together. They’re canceling plans on her. They’re just kind of fucking up.
Even though she might complain about it, that drama actually feeds into her thinking about that guy more.
Nice guys tend to usually have their shit together in most cases. They tend to be very grounded. But what happens when you’re very grounded and you have your shit together and you’re just a generally a good person.
You’re not introducing that drama that a woman craves.
Personally, I hate drama in my relationships. To me, a calm content relationship is the best. But for a woman, if things are too calm, she’s going to think, “This lacks passion.”
So you want to go, “How can I introduce a little bit of drama by being a little bit less of a nice guy?”
We go into that in Phase Two and Phase 4 of The Scrambler.
5 Ways to Stop Being the “Nice Guy”
==> 3 Steps to Status, Value, and Charisma Class
#5: Create Mystery
The more mystery there is, the more she’s going to think about you.
We teach clients about three different Facebook posts that each attempt to make a woman think about you.
Look at them, and take a guess which would make her think about you the most?
- You with your arm around a girl.
- You out with a bunch of your friends.
- A beer and a martini glass with the caption, “Cheers to a good night with good company.”Which one of those is going to make her think the most about you?
Answer: The beer and the martini glass. Because it is mysterious, it’s vague.
She’s wondering, “Who is he with?” Because she doesn’t know. She’ll think, “Is it a girl? I doubt a guy would be drinking an apple martini. It’s probably a girl. But who is the girl? Why didn’t he post a picture of her?”
Now her mind is going crazy because now there’s a mystery. It’s human nature to think about a mystery and try to solve it, so she starts thinking about you nonstop. Mystery is what The Scrambler is built upon.
Next Steps to Make Her Think About Constantly
When you really like a girl, it’s easy to be skeptical of all this counterintuitive behavior we recommend.
You think, “I want to be a sure thing, I want to let her know I like her. I don’t want to be unpredictable because if I don’t text her back, she might think I don’t like her. Then she might text the other guy that she’s talking to on Tinder.”
We know it’s hard. That’s why Unlock the Scrambler is like a roadmap. It gives you guidance on how to do it the right way. Because you don’t want to overdo it either. If you’re too much of a mystery and you’re a total jerk and you’re just kind of crazy and irrationally unpredictable and she has no hope of making you her boyfriend… then no, it’s not going to work.
It’s a balance. That’s what the The Scrambler System is really about.
So to make a woman think about you nonstop, you’ll want all these methods in the mix:
- Don’t be a sure thing. Do things that leave doubt.
- Be unpredictable. Occasionally break expectations
- Make yourself three dimensional. Don’t let her pigeonhole you as, “That type of guy.” Be the Han Solo type character with a lot of different parts to you.
- Cut out nice guy behavior. Let yourself create some drama from time to time.
- Create elements of mystery for her to think about. Stop always giving her the full story.
So if you want a PhD on this, I suggest checking out the Unlock the Scrambler Seminar.
It’s about 12 hours long because we go through each phase with example after example of how to do this.
Most guys think only of the surface level stuff, like, “I won’t text her back right away.”
That’s child’s play. That’s not the real meat of the technique. You want to get multiple levels deeper, that’s where the real benefit comes.
To go deeper with all these concepts, click the link below to check out Unlock the Scrambler… and start getting that girl to think about you nonstop.