{"id":1831,"date":"2022-09-19T15:18:51","date_gmt":"2022-09-19T15:18:51","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/?page_id=1831"},"modified":"2022-12-05T14:58:38","modified_gmt":"2022-12-05T14:58:38","slug":"3-nice-guy-mistakes","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/3-nice-guy-mistakes\/","title":{"rendered":"3 &#8220;Nice Guy&#8221; Mistakes That Scare Girls Away"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><small><a href=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/\">Dating<\/a>&gt;\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/attract-women\/\">Attraction<\/a> &gt; Nice Guy Mistakes<\/small><br \/>\n<small>by Bobby Rio\u00a0<small>\u2022\u00a0<\/small><\/small><small>Updated: September 14, 2022<\/small><\/p>\n<p><strong><small>See Also<\/small><\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><small><a href=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/what-say-to-make-her-love-you\/\">99.9% of Women Chase You When You Say \u201cTHIS\u201d<\/a><\/small><\/li>\n<li><small><a href=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/regain-upper-hand-with-girl\/\">4 Ways to Regain Her Respect &amp; Attraction<\/a><\/small><\/li>\n<li><small><a href=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/romantic-tension-women\/\">Are You a \u201cRomantic Challenge\u201d or Too Easy?<\/a><\/small><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-1837\" src=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/3NiceGuy_1-1024x580.png\" alt=\"nice guy mistakes\" width=\"1024\" height=\"580\" srcset=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/3NiceGuy_1-1024x580.png 1024w, https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/3NiceGuy_1-300x170.png 300w, https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/3NiceGuy_1-768x435.png 768w, https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/3NiceGuy_1.png 1062w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1024px) 100vw, 1024px\" \/><\/p>\n<h2>Avoid &#8220;THESE&#8221; Nice Guy Mistakes That Kill Her Attraction<\/h2>\n<p><em>Once a girl knows she has you, it&#8217;s over and you&#8217;ll never have her.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>In this article, I\u2019m going to go through three &#8220;nice guy&#8221; mistakes that will land you in the friend zone and scare away a girl that initially liked you.<\/p>\n<h3>Have You Ever Been Here?<\/h3>\n<p>Maybe you\u2019ve been in this position:<\/p>\n<p>You thought a girl was into you.<\/p>\n<p>Now <a href=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/when-she-doesnt-respond-to-text\/\">she&#8217;s not responding to your texts<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>Maybe at first she&#8217;s just not responding as fast as she normally does, but you know something&#8217;s different.<\/p>\n<p>Sure enough, she slipped away.<\/p>\n<p>Chances are it&#8217;s because you made one of these three mistakes.<\/p>\n<h3>The Danger of These Mistakes<\/h3>\n<p>What&#8217;s dangerous about them is that they&#8217;re the advice that you&#8217;re going to hear in the media and movies.<\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s the advice that your grandma would give you. It&#8217;s the advice that you hear from your female friends.<\/p>\n<p>That&#8217;s what&#8217;s so confusing and that&#8217;s why an article like this is going to challenge some views you might have.<\/p>\n<p>What I\u2019m going to say comes straight from experience.<\/p>\n<h2><strong>&#8220;Nice Guy&#8221; Mistake #1: Flowers &amp; Gifts<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p>The first of the big mistakes is sending a girl flowers at work or even just buying her any sort of gift.<\/p>\n<p>I see this over and over.<\/p>\n<p>Guys say, <em>&#8220;I sent her flowers at work and she got kind of weird after it,&#8221;<\/em> or I&#8217;ve had guys,<em> &#8220;I helped her pay her rent. I paid for her mortgage. I bought her this pocketbook she wanted.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n<p>It will always give her this feeling that something&#8217;s off. She doesn&#8217;t know quite what, but her attraction to you in that moment dissipates.<\/p>\n<p>I understand why guys make this mistake. Logically, you think, &#8220;I like getting gifts, so if I give her a gift, she&#8217;ll like it. She\u2019ll feel good. Then she&#8217;s going to associate those good feelings with me.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Unfortunately, with dating, it doesn&#8217;t work like that.<\/p>\n<p>One of the reasons it doesn&#8217;t work is because you always want to make a woman like you because of the attraction and emotions that she feels toward you.<\/p>\n<p>A lot of the emotions that create attraction, that <a href=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/make-a-girl-fall-in-love\/\">make a girl fall in love with you<\/a>, is completely different than what you think.<\/p>\n<p>One important emotion is uncertainty.<\/p>\n<h3><strong>The Magic of Uncertainty<\/strong><\/h3>\n<p>Think about when you&#8217;re falling for a girl and you&#8217;re not sure how she feels about you or she&#8217;s not responding to your texts.<\/p>\n<p>That&#8217;s when your wheels start spinning.<\/p>\n<p>That&#8217;s when you&#8217;re like, <em>&#8220;What&#8217;s going on? I really want to see this girl.&#8221;<\/em><\/p>\n<p>The minute she all of a sudden goes, &#8220;I&#8217;m in love with you,&#8221; if it happens too soon or without you having to work for it, there&#8217;s a little bit of you that goes, &#8220;Mmm, this came a little too easy. What&#8217;s wrong with her?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>It&#8217;s almost like you don&#8217;t appreciate it.<\/p>\n<p>You want to work a little bit. You want that experience of not knowing, of being a little unsure because that&#8217;s where so much of the fun of dating lies is in that uncertainty.<\/p>\n<p>Many guys are afraid to give that woman any uncertainty because they think, <em>&#8220;If she doesn&#8217;t know exactly how I feel, she might fall for another guy or I might lose her.&#8221;<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Hilariously, the truth is the exact opposite.<\/p>\n<p>Sending flowers eliminates uncertainty.<\/p>\n<p><strong>And it also creates additional problems because it\u2019s:<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Clich\u00e9<\/li>\n<li>Unimaginative<\/li>\n<li>Creepy<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Girls like it but not for the reason you think.<\/p>\n<p>They like it because they laugh about it. I learned this the hard way.<\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;m not preaching to you without having gone through this mistake.<\/p>\n<p>I remember my brother one time going, &#8220;Just get her a big bouquet.&#8221; It didn&#8217;t work.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Disclaimer<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>If you have a girlfriend &#8211; a girl that you&#8217;re in a committed relationship with &#8211; and you&#8217;re sending that girl flowers, that\u2019s totally fine.<\/p>\n<p>But if she&#8217;s not your girlfriend, do not send her flowers.<\/p>\n<p>If you haven&#8217;t had sex with her, all these rules apply.<\/p>\n<p>If you make any mistakes, chances are you won&#8217;t have sex with her.<\/p>\n<p><strong><small>See Also<\/small><\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><small><a href=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/how-to-get-a-girl-hooked-on-you\/\">#1 Way to Get a Girl Hooked on You (proven)<\/a><\/small><\/li>\n<li><small><a href=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/make-girl-think-about-you\/\">How to Make Her Think About You Non-Stop<\/a><\/small><\/li>\n<li><small><a href=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/texts-that-reveal-how-she-feels\/\">15 Texts That Reveal How She Secretly Feels<\/a><\/small><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h2><strong>&#8220;Nice Guy&#8221; Mistake #2: Confessing Feelings Too Soon<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p>The second mistake is confessing your feelings too soon.<\/p>\n<p>I remember I went on a date with this adorable girl that I met online.<\/p>\n<p>We were having the best date in the world: doing shots, dancing, hanging out\u2026<\/p>\n<p>By the end of the date, I&#8217;m just like a giddy little boy.<\/p>\n<p>I gushed, <em>&#8220;You&#8217;re so cute. I like you so much. I haven&#8217;t met any cool girls like you in a long time.&#8221;<\/em><\/p>\n<p>I was shooting myself in the foot by saying that, but I didn&#8217;t know it at the time.<\/p>\n<p>At the time, I assumed she felt the same way I did.<\/p>\n<p>The minute you start saying that to a girl, <em><strong>she knows she has you. It&#8217;s over and you&#8217;ll never have her.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n<p>Write that down.<\/p>\n<p>In college, before I knew this stuff, I would confess my feelings to a girl and she would give me a pity pat like, &#8220;That&#8217;s really nice.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Then I&#8217;d watch her go chase some guy that was keeping her guessing, leaving her in that place of uncertainty.<\/p>\n<p>Sometimes he would go hot and cold, but he would never come out and say, &#8220;Hey, I really like you. Be my girlfriend.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>You can\u2019t say that too early. You can only say it to a girl you&#8217;ve been seeing for a long time. Usually she&#8217;ll be the one to bring it up the talk about becoming your girlfriend.<\/p>\n<p>In fact, that\u2019s another rule: always make her bring it up the subject of commitment.<\/p>\n<h2>The Truth About the &#8220;Commitment Talk&#8221;<\/h2>\n<p>If you&#8217;re dating a girl, don&#8217;t be the one to go, <em>&#8220;So what is this? Are you seeing anybody else?&#8221;<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Let her bring up that conversation.<\/p>\n<p>Keep that in your back pocket as long as possible.<\/p>\n<p>Guys will often ask, <em>&#8220;I can&#8217;t let a girl know that I like her?&#8221;<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong>My answer is:<\/strong> You can let a girl know that you want to bang her. Don&#8217;t hide the fact that you&#8217;re sexually attracted to her. But don&#8217;t let her know immediately that you want to be her boyfriend.<\/p>\n<p>You wanting to be her boyfriend is what she wants to work for.<\/p>\n<p>She wants to go to her friends and say, <em>&#8220;What do I have to do? He didn&#8217;t text.&#8221;<\/em><\/p>\n<p>She wants that drama and that uncertainty.<\/p>\n<p>If you come right out and start talking relationships, you&#8217;re taking that gift of missing you away from her.<\/p>\n<p>If you can get her to read an article like this to decipher your behavior, you&#8217;re doing the right thing.<\/p>\n<p>The whole reason you&#8217;re reading this is probably because you have one girl in mind, that one girl that you really want.<\/p>\n<p>You want to be the guy that inspirers those same feelings in her because it&#8217;s that experience that women want and, as guys, I don&#8217;t think we even fully appreciate.<\/p>\n<p>Look at <a href=\"https:\/\/www.goodhousekeeping.com\/life\/entertainment\/g3243\/best-romantic-comedy-movies\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">romantic comedies<\/a> and what women are interested in.<\/p>\n<p>These screenwriters understand this. When you watch a romantic comedy, the main character is a woman going through an experience of uncertainty. \u201cHe likes me, he doesn\u2019t like me.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>As you watch it, you\u2019re going, <em>&#8220;Are they going to get together at the end?&#8221;<\/em><\/p>\n<h2><strong>Do Women Like Jerks?<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p>Some men make the mistake of thinking, &#8220;Women like assholes. Women like jerks.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>If you find yourself saying that, you&#8217;re missing what they really find attractive about jerks.<\/p>\n<p>A woman isn&#8217;t attracted to a jerk because he puts her down or talks like an asshole.<\/p>\n<p>A woman is <a href=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/why-girls-love-jerks\">attracted to a jerk because he\u2019s hard to catch<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>A lot of guys in a friend zone go, <em>&#8220;I don&#8217;t know why she&#8217;s still with him. She&#8217;s always complaining about her boyfriend.&#8221;<\/em><\/p>\n<p>You have to understand women like the drama. They&#8217;re complaining about him because they can&#8217;t quite have him. They&#8217;re always chasing him.<\/p>\n<p>When I used to hear a woman complain about a jerk boyfriend, I would make the mistake of presenting myself as the opposite of him.<\/p>\n<p>Don\u2019t do that. If you do, it will lead you into our third mistake.<\/p>\n<h2>&#8220;Nice Guy&#8221; Mistake #3: Being Too Available<\/h2>\n<p>Time after time, you\u2019ll see a woman who\u2019s into a jerk.<\/p>\n<p>He\u2019s hanging out with his friends instead of meeting up with her.<\/p>\n<p>He cancels plans at the last minute.<\/p>\n<p>We hear her complain about it, so we try to be the opposite. We think, \u201cOh, I won\u2019t hang out with my friends. I\u2019ll be there for her because that\u2019s what she wants.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>That\u2019s not what she wants.<\/p>\n<p>Don\u2019t be the dependable guy picking her up at two in the morning, driving her home. She\u2019ll know that you\u2019re always there. She\u2019ll have you figured out.<\/p>\n<p>The whole ride back to her house, she&#8217;s going to be complaining about the guy that she really likes.<\/p>\n<h3>A Mentor\u2019s Shocking Advice<\/h3>\n<p>My mentor once said to me, &#8220;<em>If you really want to understand a woman and what attracts her, listen to her when she talks about her exes. Ask her what she hated about her last boyfriend.&#8221;<\/em><\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;ve had girlfriends that will complain about their exes. Usually, the thing a girl complains about her exes\u2026 is the same thing you need to do to attract he<\/p>\n<p>Now the exception to that rule is if a guy did some legitimately bad and hurtful stuff.<\/p>\n<p>But usually, a woman talking about her ex is giving you her attraction blueprint.<\/p>\n<h3><strong>Using Uncertainty<\/strong><\/h3>\n<p>As human beings, we&#8217;re naturally programmed to <a href=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/4-chase-triggers\/\">chase things that are confusing and uncertain<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>We want to know the answer. We hate incomplete things.<\/p>\n<p>You want to make that your priority early on in a relationship, is to leave her wondering.<\/p>\n<p>You may be reading this and thinking, &#8220;That make sense,&#8221; but when you&#8217;re hanging out with her, be careful that your emotions don\u2019t take over.<\/p>\n<p>Think of your emotions as a dickless virgin whispering bad advice: &#8220;Text her again. Maybe her phone is broken.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Her phone&#8217;s not broken, I promise you. She got your text.<\/p>\n<h2>Avoid These 5 Mistakes When a Girl Starts &#8220;Pulling Away&#8221;<\/h2>\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"YouTube video player\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/iyb5w6VsdE8\" width=\"560\" height=\"315\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><\/iframe><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/technique\/\"><strong>Watch the Scrambler Video<\/strong><\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h2><strong>The Next Step<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p>To help you create uncertainty with the woman you want, we created something a little sneaky, a little nefarious.<\/p>\n<p>We call it <a href=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/technique\/\">the Scrambler.<\/a><\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s a roadmap that guides you along.<\/p>\n<p>This isn\u2019t politically correct to say, but it\u2019s a little bit of a mind game.<\/p>\n<p>If you use it correctly, by the end, she&#8217;s going to be reading articles like this trying to decipher your behavior.<\/p>\n<p>She\u2019s going to be on the computer googling,<em> &#8220;What did it mean when he said this?&#8221;<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Other guys are going to be pushed out of her head because she\u2019s going to be focusing all her attention and desire on you.<\/p>\n<p>We have a link to a video about the Scrambler below.<\/p>\n<p>It walks you through<a href=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/technique\/\"> the step-by-step process to get her infatuated with you<\/a>\u2026<\/p>\n<p>\u2026 and to get that dickless virgin out of your head.<\/p>\n<p>Make sure you don\u2019t ruin your chances by making those three mistakes.<\/p>\n<p>They\u2019re simple in theory, but if you don&#8217;t have a roadmap, you often forget because your emotions take over.<\/p>\n<p>All of a sudden you&#8217;re going, &#8220;Why did I do that? Why did I pay off her mortgage?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/technique\/\">Click here and we\u2019ll walk you through the Scrambler.<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Dating&gt;\u00a0Attraction &gt; Nice Guy Mistakes by Bobby Rio\u00a0\u2022\u00a0Updated: September 14, 2022 See Also 99.9% of Women Chase You When You Say \u201cTHIS\u201d 4 Ways to Regain Her Respect &amp; Attraction Are You a \u201cRomantic Challenge\u201d or Too Easy? Avoid &#8220;THESE&#8221; Nice Guy Mistakes That Kill Her Attraction Once a girl knows she has you, it&#8217;s [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":0,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"page-posts.php","meta":{"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-1831","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/1831","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1831"}],"version-history":[{"count":9,"href":"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/1831\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1843,"href":"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/1831\/revisions\/1843"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1831"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}