{"id":371,"date":"2022-09-09T19:55:25","date_gmt":"2022-09-09T19:55:25","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/?page_id=371"},"modified":"2022-09-14T13:34:32","modified_gmt":"2022-09-14T13:34:32","slug":"does-she-want-to-sleep-with-you","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/does-she-want-to-sleep-with-you\/","title":{"rendered":"Send Her This Text to See if She Wants to Sleep with You"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><small><a href=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/\">Dating<\/a>\u00a0&gt;\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advictell-if-a-girl-likes\">Signs<\/a> &gt; Does She Want Sex\u00a0<\/small><br \/>\n<small>by Rob Judge \u2022 <\/small><small>Updated: August 31, 2022<\/small><\/p>\n<p><strong><small>See Also<\/small><\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><small><a href=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/why-girls-pull-away\/\">Do NOT do THIS When a Girl \u201cPulls Away\u201d<\/a><\/small><\/li>\n<li><small><a href=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/questions-to-ask-girl\/\">3 Magic Questions to Know If She&#8217;ll Sleep with You<\/a><\/small><\/li>\n<li><small><a href=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/5-signs-shes-just-not-into-you\/\">5 Signs She\u2019s Just Not Into You<\/a><\/small><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-large wp-image-1693\" src=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/does-she-want-to-sleep-with-you-1024x576.jpg\" alt=\"does she want to sleep with you\" width=\"1024\" height=\"576\" srcset=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/does-she-want-to-sleep-with-you-1024x576.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/does-she-want-to-sleep-with-you-300x169.jpg 300w, https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/does-she-want-to-sleep-with-you-768x432.jpg 768w, https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/does-she-want-to-sleep-with-you.jpg 1280w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1024px) 100vw, 1024px\" \/><\/p>\n<h2><strong>This (not Perverted) Message-Reveals How DTF She <em>Really<\/em>\u00a0Is<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p>Not going to lie: it&#8217;s a damn good time to be a single guy!<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/how-to-meet-girls-on-tinder\/\">Dating apps<\/a> like tinder and Bumble have made meeting women so much easier\u00a0while social media and <a href=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/texting-girls\/\">texting<\/a> has made getting to know those women so much less awkward.<\/p>\n<p>These days, the first time you actually have to talk to a beautiful woman (as in, like, with your voice) only happens\u00a0<em>after<\/em> she&#8217;s decided she likes you enough to meet you for a first date.<\/p>\n<p>Better yet, the stigma that once hung over <a href=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/what-women-want-you-to-do-in-bed\/\">casual sex<\/a> like a shameful black cloud seems more and more old fashioned by the day.<\/p>\n<p>Women have become comfortable expressing (ahem,\u00a0<em>enjoying<\/em>) their sexuality however they want thanks to the likes of\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Sex_and_the_City\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><em>Sex and the City<\/em><\/a>\u00a0and\u00a0<em><a href=\"https:\/\/www.imdb.com\/title\/tt2322441\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">50 Shades of Grey<\/a>.<\/em>\u00a0(Oh yeah and decades of social reform as well as the scientific discovery that led to effective birth control may have played a part, as well!)<\/p>\n<p>Damn good as things may be, there&#8217;s still a catch.<\/p>\n<p>The line separating &#8220;sexy&#8221; and &#8220;creepy&#8221; has become razor-thin!<\/p>\n<h3>One Creepy Move Kills a Woman&#8217;s Interest<\/h3>\n<p>All it takes to become a creature from Creeperville is <a href=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/texts-to-never-send-a-girl\/\">one wrong text<\/a>, one stupid comment, or even just one ill-planned move.<\/p>\n<p>We both know: if a girl feels &#8220;creeped out,&#8221; you&#8217; re out, and there&#8217;s no way back in.<\/p>\n<p>Game over.<\/p>\n<p>So pack up and hit the showers, alone. You&#8217;ve been there. I&#8217;ve been there.<\/p>\n<p><em>Any<\/em>\u00a0guy looking to date with intentions that are both good\u00a0<em>and<\/em>\u00a0casual\u00a0<em>has been there<\/em>! And while there are plenty of beautiful women looking for the exact same thing, not\u00a0<em>all<\/em>\u00a0women are looking for the same thing.<\/p>\n<h2>So How do Tell if a Woman is Looking for Sex?<\/h2>\n<p>How do you determine which women are sexually open and which are more reserved or looking for more of a commitment first?<\/p>\n<p>The answer to that question is, to quote President Trump?<em>YUGE<\/em>!<\/p>\n<p>Answer it right, you can make your sex life great (again).<\/p>\n<p>Answer wrong and it&#8217;s going to seem as if there&#8217;s a giant wall separating you from womankind. (And by the way, you&#8217;re paying for that wall!)<\/p>\n<p>So, how would you respond if you found yourself on a bus, with the president, hot mics on, and he asked:<\/p>\n<h3><strong>&#8220;What can you do to find out if a woman is down to f*ck (DTF)??<\/strong><\/h3>\n<ul>\n<li><em>just come right out and ask her<\/em><\/li>\n<li><em>find something you can use to stereotype her (e.g., how she dresses)<\/em><\/li>\n<li><em>check if she has ?not here for hookups? in her tinder profile<\/em><\/li>\n<li><em>send her the message Rob is about to reveal and then gauge her response<\/em><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>If your answer is anything other than D, you?re getting deported to Creeperville.<\/p>\n<p>Now, before I reveal\u00a0<em>why<\/em> the correct answer is something I haven&#8217;t yet told you, let me first tell you why the other answers are wrong:<\/p>\n<p><strong>A) Just come right out and ask her:<\/strong>As a rule of thumb, never ask a woman a question that has an &#8220;emotional&#8221; answer. Just like you should never ask a woman, &#8220;Do you like me?&#8221; or &#8220;Do you find me attractive?&#8221;\u00a0 You should never ask her, &#8220;Are we going to have sex?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Asking such a question ensures her answer will be NO (even if it was &#8220;yes).<\/p>\n<p><strong>B) Find something you can use to stereotype her (e.g., how she dresses):<\/strong> Take it from a guy who&#8217;s been aggressively dating for well over a decade: there is no way to determine if a woman is sexually open (generally), and especially not with you (specifically), based on how she&#8217;s dressed, whether or not she has tattoos, or anything else about her appearance you think confirms or refutes how you believe she regards sex.<\/p>\n<p>Even if you think you&#8217;ve found the &#8220;telltale&#8221; sign, there will always be exceptions.<\/p>\n<p><strong>C) Check if she has &#8220;not here for hookups&#8221; in her tinder profile:<\/strong> Some girls who say &#8220;not here for hookups&#8221; actually mean it; others mean it about as much as when a girl invites you back to her place and says, &#8220;but don&#8217;t think that means we&#8217;re having sex!&#8221; (Usually followed by her asking if you have a condom &#8220;just in case&#8221;)<\/p>\n<p>Alright, now that you know what not to do (read: basically everything every other guy does to see if a girl&#8217;s DTF).<\/p>\n<p>Let me show you THE MESSAGE (definitive and singular!) I send to see how DTF a girl with whom I&#8217;m messaging may or may not be.<\/p>\n<h2>The Text That Tells You How Likely You Are to Sleep with Her<\/h2>\n<p><strong>First, let&#8217;s set the scene:<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><em>Tinder, Sunday, 8:14pm:\u00a0Rob&#8217;s been messaging back and forth with a cute girl who looks amazing in yoga pants.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong>Rob:<\/strong> Let&#8217;s grab drinks later this week<\/p>\n<p><strong>Her:<\/strong>\u00a0That should work!<\/p>\n<p><strong>Rob:<\/strong> Excellent, shall we be old-fashioned and exchange numbers? I&#8217;m 555-555-5555<\/p>\n<p><strong>Her:<\/strong> Old fashioned? lol I&#8217;m 555-555-5555<\/p>\n<p>With numbers exchanged and a date pending, here&#8217;s how I&#8217;d determine how open or closed she is for first-date sex:<\/p>\n<p><strong>Rob:<\/strong> Ha yeah, I&#8217;m kinda traditional so don&#8217;t expect any dick pics until after marriage<\/p>\n<p>No matter how she responds (and even if she doesn&#8217;t respond at all), I can put her in one of three categories:<\/p>\n<p><strong>1. DTF:\u00a0 <\/strong>She&#8217;s (probably) &#8220;Down to Fuck&#8221; if her response has a lot of (positive) enthusiasm like, &#8220;You&#8217;re going to make me wait?&#8221; or &#8220;hahahahahaha then I&#8217;m making you wait for my nudes!!!&#8221; (both are actual responses I&#8217;ve received and hypothesis confirmed: they were DTF).<\/p>\n<p><strong>2. ND:\u00a0 <\/strong>She&#8217;s &#8220;Not Down!!&#8221; if she goes silent or gets pissed. While I&#8217;ve never had a girl object to my &#8220;no dick pics before marriage&#8221; line, I once asked a cosmologist if she ever bleached ass hair and she responded, &#8220;why would you even ask such a question?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>This told me loud and clear: she&#8217;s not very down for casual sex (or at least not with me!). And while I still went on a few dates with her, that prediction was later confirmed.<\/p>\n<p><strong>3. DTF@ Some Point: <\/strong>She&#8217;s &#8220;down to fuck at some point&#8221; if she responds, but there&#8217;s some hesitation or uneasiness. A simple &#8220;haha&#8221; or &#8220;omg&#8221; are the sort of lukewarm responses that tell me she probably likes me, but isn&#8217;t (yet) down for what I might have in mind on a &#8220;casual&#8221; first date.<\/p>\n<p>This is no big deal? I just need to be a bit more aware of her comfortable level and keep my expectations in check. Remember: this doesn&#8217;t mean she&#8217;s totally not down (!!) She&#8217;s just not down <em>YET<\/em>.<\/p>\n<p>The &#8220;magic&#8221; of sending a message like this, which playfully tells her you AREN&#8217;T going to do something perverted, is that it you have <strong><em>deniability<\/em><\/strong>. A woman can&#8217;t call you a creep if you&#8217;re telling you&#8217;re NOT going to do something creepy!<\/p>\n<p>And if she does, chances are she&#8217;s ND!! in any way, shape, or form. In that case you just saved yourself some time filtering out a girl you had absolutely no chance with anyway.<\/p>\n<p>Even when a (reasonable) girl DOES get agitated (which may happen, especially if asked about bleaching butts), if she actually likes you, then it&#8217;s usually not a deal-breaker (again, this is assuming she actually likes you).<\/p>\n<p>While it may cause a minor &#8220;hiccup&#8221; in the interaction, the reward justifies the risk, at least in my opinion.<\/p>\n<p>That said, in no way is it necessary to determine if a girl is DTF prior to meeting her.<\/p>\n<p>This is\u00a0<em>especially<\/em> true if you&#8217; re looking for a girlfriend and\/or casual sex isn&#8217;t your thing.<\/p>\n<p>I probably only use a message like this <em>half<\/em>\u00a0the time myself, and just so I know what to expect. That way, I can better plan our date.<\/p>\n<p>While I don&#8217;t want to end on a moral note, I do want to point out that knowing if a girl is DTF usually makes the date better for <strong>both<\/strong><em>\u00a0you and her<\/em>.<\/p>\n<p>While my &#8220;one-message DTF test&#8221; might seem offensive or creepy to some (i.e., all women), you what&#8217;s FAR MORE offensive and creepy &#8220;NOT knowing if a girl is DTF&#8221; and doing something that makes her totally uncomfortable!<\/p>\n<p>Don&#8217;t be that creep; instead use my playful (dare I say: <em>gentlemanly<\/em>) message.<\/p>\n<p>Do it for\u00a0<em>her<\/em>\u00a0pleasure.<\/p>\n<p><strong>See Also<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/texts-that-reveal-how-she-feels\/\">15 Texts That Reveal Her True Feelings<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/examples-of-good-texts\/\">Steal &#8220;THESE&#8221; 7 Texts to Send Girls<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/words-that-turn-women-on\/\">5 &#8220;Words&#8221; That Turn Every Woman On<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/10-rules-for-texting-a-girl\/\">10 Rules for Texting Girls<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/how-to-arouse-a-woman\/\">How to Arouse a Woman (Step-by-Step)<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Dating\u00a0&gt;\u00a0Signs &gt; Does She Want Sex\u00a0 by Rob Judge \u2022 Updated: August 31, 2022 See Also Do NOT do THIS When a Girl \u201cPulls Away\u201d 3 Magic Questions to Know If She&#8217;ll Sleep with You 5 Signs She\u2019s Just Not Into You This (not Perverted) Message-Reveals How DTF She Really\u00a0Is Not going to lie: it&#8217;s [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":0,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"page-posts.php","meta":{"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-371","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/371","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=371"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/371\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1723,"href":"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/371\/revisions\/1723"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/bobbyriotraining.com\/advice\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=371"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}